I think it’s a good time to talk about something light and a bit frivolous. Like Fashion! That last post was a little weighty and…who am I kidding? I’m just in a good mood and, nearly every second that I’m not working or talking to friends, I’ve been looking at images from Fashion Week. Unlike the resort collections this summer, these collections are stunning and inspiring. They have me wanting to play dress up. One of my biggest To Dos in NYC is simply to go to clothing stores and boutiques to try on clothes, just for fun.
As I’ve been perusing these images and dreaming up my own wardrobe, I’ve noticed a bit of a change in my relationship with fashion now that I weigh in the high-160s (yeah, pretty excited about that, by the way! This would be the smallest I’ve been in my adult life). It made me reflect on the difference there used to be in how I felt about fashion and how I felt about my own clothes.
While I was wearing plus size, what ruled my taste was what was flattering. When I went shopping or thought about clothes for myself, the main question on my mind wasn’t “Does this reflect my style?,” it was “Would this look good on me?.” I avoided both oversized things and clinging, tight clothes. I wanted everything to fit perfectly, to make me look no bigger than I was and possibly create the illusion I was smaller. I wanted pants that gave my body proportion. I wanted shirts that made me look more buxom and like I had a smaller waistline. Or shirts with structured that gave me a better shape. Etc.
When I wasn’t looking for clothes for myself, I viewed fashion very differently. Looking at good street style, runway fashion or a well-designed add, I thought about so much more than what is flattering (though I still think that always matters-that clothing should work on the body in it). Usually what I fall for most is not a specific piece, it’s a look. It’s the attitude and emotion that’s evoked by how the silhouette of a wearer is complimented by a combination of colors, textures, and cuts. It’s about how one’s personality and mood can be captured by clothing.
But I rarely thought about this for myself except in terms of jewelry. For that reason, I rarely used to compose an outfit without jewelry. Sometimes it felt like my accessories were the only touches that were truly me.
Now that I’m thinner, now that my body is more proportionate and I have less to conceal, I’m starting to think about my own fashion in this way. When I go clothes shopping I think about the silhouette that I want to strike. I think about the aspects of my style and self that I want to capture and reflect. I consider the outfits that I’ll be able to compose. Jewelry has become much less of a necessity because the composition of my outfits are capturing more of me.
Thinking about this change reminds me of something Caslte said on the tv show a few years ago. In a discussion about being rich, he said that the nice thing about having lots of money is simply that it’s not something he has to think about. It hasn’t made his life perfect or granted him happiness; it has simply allowed him to devote his energy and attention to other things besides earning money. I feel similarly about losing weight.
Being thinner hasn’t miraculously made me happier or entirely improved my life; it’s simply taken more obstacles out of my way. In terms of fashion, it allows me more freedom to focus my energy on what matters more to me.
While I’m having a bit more fun with fashion now, I’m grateful for the relationship I’ve always with it. In many ways, I believe that valuing fashion has always helped me to value myself. When you embrace your size and dress for it (no matter what that size is), when you take enough pride in your body to make it look good, it’s hard not to feel good. Even when my closet didn’t perfectly suit my style, it flattered me.
A Few of the Looks I Love From Fashion Week (all images are from The Sartorialist)
Dolce & Gabbana, Spring/Summer 2013
I’d wear that dress in a heartbeat (if I could afford it). This collection is by far my favorite! Garance also did an excellent job covering it. View her images here.
Prada, Spring/Summer 2013
So sleek and imaginative!
Marc Jacobs, Spring/Summer 2013
I adore this collection’s silhouettes and graphic prints!
(You can tell I have a thing for drama can’t you?)